...Daddy and I started to listen, and observe, and really pay attention. We started to study, really study, what was going on around us. You know what? We did NOT like what we learned. As homeschoolers in the midwest we are deeply submerged into this subculture of other homeschoolers and often times the only other interaction my kids get are either with other homeschoolers or at church. Then church life and homeschool culture became so enmeshed that the ideas expressed were so eerily similar that they sounded as if they were memorized from the same script. Its this idea of Biblical Patriarchy and its running rampant throughout the area right now. I seriously hope that it is just a fad. I truly believe it is not biblical and the holy spirit inside me is telling me to run, run away and run far. Now the keyword here is ME. What the holy spirit is telling me very well might, and most likely will, be different than what It will lead you to do. The basic, watered down of this movement is that the husband is the boss, and women are to just do whatever he says. The woman's sole purpose on earth is to be a wife and mother and to have any other thoughts is not only detrimental to the family, but also angers God. Girl children are to remain under their father's "care and protection" until such time that they are married. Even if that time lasts well into adulthood. Dating relationships are through courtships only that are established by the parents. This environment is very demeaning to women and places women at a position of inferiority to men. They believe that God was male. The problem with definitive Biblical fact-statements such as this is that man is attempting to put God in a box and to force God to fit their definition of Him. That's not the way God works. He created us, to be like Him. Not the other way around. God created both man and woman in His image. Confused or don't quite understand? Good, because we aren't meant to fully understand God. That is why God is God and we are man.
"[T]he woman was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of
his head to rule over him, nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by
him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be
protected, and near his heart to be beloved." Matthew Henry Commentary on
Genesis 2:22
See man and woman are equals, created to be partners. Created to love and cherish each other. Not created to live in an environment of abuse and degradation. According to Doug Wilson of The Vision Forum, one of the premiere front leaders of the Patriarchal movement in his article "Not Where She Should Be" woman have many rebellious acts that need to be lead into a godly and correct attitude:
The symptoms can of course vary. He may be distressed over her spending
habits, television viewing habits, weight, rejection of his leadership,
laziness in cleaning the house, lack of responsiveness to sexual
advances, whatever. But however the problem is manifested, what should a
husband do?
Did you all catch that? Husband's have a right to "lead" their wives in matters of what they think their wives should weigh after giving birth to their multiple loads of children, how often and by when the dishes need to be washed even though they have to take care of the kids too, and at the end of a very long day, she must be in the mood. If she doesn't he has the authority to discipline her, bring in elders of the church to correct her behavior, or handle the matter "his own way". REALLY? Wow. Sign me and my 3 female children up for that. (Now I am not dictating that many kids are bad, simply that if a woman gains weight with it, WHO CARES? Praise her mighty body for doing it and Worship God for the creation that is woman and our magical ability to create life. Who really cares about some weight gain!?!?!?) Oh yeah, something else that is also popular within these families is "spare the rod, spoil the child" where they use an actual, literal rod to BEAT their children into submission. Google Micheal and Debbie Pearl for more info, but really it should be considered child abuse.
So yeah, something funny, or more ironic, did happen on the way to church. The biblical patriarchy movement that is running rampant and seems to be at every church we try, and promises a better future and life for our family if we only follow their formula, did in fact improve our family. True we aren't attending a church right now, and Yes I do deeply miss the worship on Sunday morning, but what has happened out of this I find myself thanking God for every night. Out of His grace and mysterious ways God has open this path of communication between us and Him. Instead of taking every word that a pastor tells us as the TRUTH, we question everything, look up every reference, cross reference everything and truly STUDY our bibles, not just read them or memorize verses to say we memorize them. Sure you can spout back verses at me but can you tell me what it means? It has forced us to have constant contact with The Father, a deeper relationship with The Son, and to listen for and act upon what the Holy Spirit is leading us to do. One this I know for sure, I can't WAIT to get out of fundamentalist, right-wing, holier-than-thou, lets-all-worship-Todd-Akin-homeschool-cultish-land.
Homeschool-land. Now that's a whole different post that I am still sorting though in my mind. Perhaps I will bring it up later. Much later.
Just to leave on a happy note...Little Mad Hatter and Little Queen of Hearts are getting along today and playing together nicely...by putting colorful blankets on their heads and walking around the house chasing their baby sister and acting like ghosts. Of course the Little Cheshire cat baby sister will have none of that and has decided that Pirates are more fierce than ghosts and is attacking back. Oy vey, where are my migraine meds? At least they are getting along, right?
If you really want more info on this topic, try The Vision Forum vs Rethinking Vision Forum and A Quiverfull of Information
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